March 2012
4 posts
7 tags
The Everything But Rap & Country Recording Co.™ →
so i had to make a ‘catalog number’ in order to get a record pressed and i figured if i was going to have to make up a fake label name i might as well have a label too
as of right now the only thing this label is releasing is the 250-record limited run of my LP “look at the mess you’ve made” but i’m giving a lot of thought about possibly releasing other artists...
February 2012
26 posts
RIP Davy Jones
Bad Kickstarter of the Week →
“i value virtual relationships!”
i stole this link from @bransonbranson on twitter but i dunno what his tumblr is so consider this a feeble attempt at accreditation
realtalk
att’n aspiring rap legends
if you’re selling your mixtapes at the flea market, or putting up free downloads on mixtapetorrents, you might wanna wait to start writing tracks about how hard it is to be rich and famous
you don’t get to be drake just cuz you’re sad and have a bad haircut
some dudes wanna paint broad strokes with it im detailed like a thousand dots some wanna be hip hop jackson pollock im tryin to be rap seurat -like- karabekian clowns, they try to copy the style just flip the one that you got no time for denials, we conquerin’ trials hercules style — pass the rock (get it?) keep it surreal — i am so real boilin up — show you how Dr No feel...
old people are dumb (except me)
a lot of you guys know that i am in my thirties. a lot of you also know that i grew up in florida. the combination of these two items means that many people whom i count amongst my friends are now bonafide ‘southern dads’, which in turn means that i am exposed to a whole lot of embarrassing things that most people only think exist in the world of parody
for instance, today this was...
~~audio sketch~~
obv. inspired by DâM-FunK and i...
there is a band called “i killed the prom queen”
they are not all teenage girls, which would be the only acceptable circumstance in which to name a band this
1 tag
“i forgot how good it feels
to be part of a spinning wheel
supporting and...”
– samiam, from the song “dull”
5 tags
friends don't let friends make the bass face
“Do I take risks in order to gobble up the fruit symbol in the middle of the...”
– Martin Amis, from “Invasion of the Space Invaders”, a guide to classic arcade games.
i dont think james brown really was the hardest working man in show biz
the hardest working man in show biz was probably some dude who just played shows at shitty bars and places that served chicken wings, like five days a week, for his entire life
the hardest working man in show biz probably thought james brown was a fucking asshole
bransonbranson: Fridge →
bransonbransonbranson:
“I don’t understand people that keep beer in their house.”
“There is beer in this house.”
“No, but keep it. Like, we are drinking this. But someone who has, like, seven bottles of some craft beer on them at all times. They drink three of those beers and think, ‘wow, time to buy more…
a friend of mine sent me a bottle of the ‘clutch’ beer by new...
1 tag
look i don't have photoshop at work so use your...
~~COMPUTER PROGRAMMER~~ WHAT MY FRIENDS THINK I DO: *photograph of mad scientist in secret lab doin’ science shit*
WHAT MY MOM THINKS I DO: *photograph of guy fixing computers*
WHAT SOCIETY THINKS I DO: *photograph of nerdy dude in thick glasses sitting at a computer*
WHAT I REALLY DO: *photograph of unkempt man constructing ‘What __ Thinks I Do’ image macro on home computer,...
Clikatat Ikatowi "Orchestrated and Conducted By"
SWING SWING SWING THIS IS SAN DIEGO!
i did not rip nor upload nor host this record but it is seriously one of the best examples of EXTREMELY ‘art-damaged’ post-hardcore in the common memory
it is weird to think that there was a point in time when fifteen year olds got together and started bands that sounded like THIS
download this music
1 tag
THE MUSIC WHICH I MAKE IS HERE: →
not only do i write stuff i also make some music, rap music (but sometimes other music), and it’s all free to check out from this one convenient location
oh hey it's this thing
i guess i should start doing things here more frequently? it is a good place to write long dumb shit that doesn’t fit on twitter
this has been a content-filled post from your buddy jay
September 2011
1 post
1 tag
when i was super-little i lived next door to a little girl that was about the same age as me so our parents had us play together a lot.
she had a baby doll that was supposed to teach you about child-rearing or something? it came with a bunch of packets of colored ‘food’ that had the consistency of apple-sauce but was in various bright colors like blue, red, etc.
after you fed the...
August 2011
3 posts
3 tags
i did this for you (a track-by-track encounter...
so i learned a while ago that limp bizkit was releasing a brand-new album in the year of our lord 2011 and that struck me as incredibly ridiculous so of course i started following fred durst on twitter and getting hella excited in the most ironic way possible (hooray for america)
during the build-up to the album’s release and inevitable failure, durst spent a lot of time talking about how...
July 2011
51 posts
THOUGHT CATALOG - OWNIN' HARD SINCE 2010 (hipster)
let’s all be thought catalog contributors
THOUGHT CATALOG is sweeping the nation, here are a bunch of folks on twitter pitching awesome new article ideas to the smartest site on the internet
3 tags
this is a drop i made for my good friend Boogie...
@RapIlluminati
4 tags
man, alesis is screwin the pooch [bitchin' up a...
can’t use my fuckin firewire audio box because i’m a dumbass and upgraded to lion.
alesis is passing the buck like crazy and just posting boilerplate responses on twitter. no other manufacturers seem to have this firewire problem and all the alesis USB stuff works perfectly. but for some reason this doesn’t seem to be an urgent issue for these guys.
i wanna record something...
WRONG RAP REFERENCES
i know pablo / noriega / the real noriega / we play nintendo on the sega
2 tags
a boring track-by-track journey through a new they...
I’ve been a fan of TMBG since I was like eight years old. This isn’t really a cool thing for me to admit. I was a weird hardcore kid for most of my teenage years and now I make rap music and neither is really a good fit for “intense They Might Be Giants fandom.” When most people think of a They Might Be Giants fan, they thing of somebody who quotes Monty Python and wears...
in reference to the previous post
this is not my first experience with obvious jokes being taken very seriously on the internet. a lot of you are familiar with this:
http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/07/22/alvin-greenes-on-the-scene/
and if you’re not, it’s something that twitter stalwart virgiltexas and i engineered last year during the run-up to the 2010 election. alvin greene was a pretty entertaining...
1 tag
poe's law
Poe’s Law is an axiom suggesting that it’s difficult to distinguish between parodies of religious fundamentalism (or, more generally, parodies of any crackpot or extremist belief) and genuine proponents of religious fundamentalism, since they both seem equally insane. Conversely, real fundamentalism can easily be mistaken for a parody of fundamentalism.
i have had a ton of fun...
2 tags
SUBTEXTKCD →
i don’t want to clog up my blog with nothing but these xkcd parodies so from now they will all live here. follow that blog if you wanna keep up with the latest in mockery
1 tag
3 tags
1 tag
3 tags
Computers 'Putin
Cam'ron: Welcome to AOL Rap Chat I am your moderator, Cam'ron Giles
xGoku420x: LOL CAMRON U GAY
Cam'rom: No Homo or you will be kicked from the chat room.
2 tags
5 tags
